Life On Your Own Terms: A lesson from a Canine Friend

A number of years ago I had the idea of writing down some of the ideas that popped into my mind on a daily basis. I was constantly confronted with unhappy miserable people who seemed to view life as nothing but a struggle. Even surrounding myself as much as possible with forward thinking and positive individuals didn't seem to keep away the negative vibes of unhappy people. They were everywhere. I dismissed the idea of writing my positive ideas down and I soon found that was a critical mistake.What was happening around me was affecting me more than I realized.

Sometimes the negativity made me mad, other times I just dismissed it and attempted to hold on to a positive outlook, but this alone proved insufficient over time. At some point my unusual optimism began to fade, and I, like the unhappy ones, began to drift into some of the same patterns of isolation, loneliness and unhappiness.

Each day, no longer held the promise of a new sunrise, new optimism for the future, a new idea. I was caught in a holding pattern where life was fastly becoming a burden, rather than a joy. The same ways of those miserable others were infiltrating my psyche and behold, I was becoming one of them.

Then one day, not too far in that progression, I began to realize the inward hostility that had gradually come upon my life and it scared me. Somewhere along the way, I had briefly forgotten the happy person that awakened each morning, full of optimism and not crippled by the spiritless domain of negativity. I knew that I had let myself get off track and that I was responsible for getting back to my true self-which
lived in a world of possibility.

Fortunately, it didn't' take me long, and today I realize that I have been blessed with an ability to quickly rebound from adversity and sorrow. I am about that process now.

Recently, my soul mate and I have dealt with the loss of our second canine friend,
In November 2007, my best friend in the canine world was overwhelmed by a malignant tumor on his spine, a condition which began a rapid deterioration. With the assistance of a dear friend and professor of Veterinary medicine, along with a second faculty member, "Cody" my black lab was put to sleep, near a burning hearth on our patio on a nice November day.

At this writing, eleven months after, our precious buddy "Reiider" a beautiful Cocker Spaniel has also suffered the effects of a fast growing cancer. After a last camping trip and at the terminal stages of his life, we once again did for Reiider as we did for Cody. As I write this I go in and out of my grief as does my partner.Yet, there is something that I see plainly and it has taught me more by a canine than any life experience.

"Reiider" lived his life on his own terms. A canine of strong, but determined will, Nurtured by love and ever adventurous, he spent his life on a never ending tract of inquiry and limitless possibility. He was the most forward thinking pooch we have ever known.

Each day brought new adventure for our little Cocker and he went about life on his own terms, preferring to accept or reject parental limitations that we put on our canine friends. He simply let you believe that he was listening to us, when in reality he was awaiting the opportunity to do as he saw fit, run his course on his own terms. Naturally, he let you believe that your scolding or disapproval had some influence on him, but it really didn't. That was okay with him, as long as we were happy.

In a canine state of intelligence, his gift was an amazing ability to see his world in terms of possibility and to participate in its fullness without bounds, His limitless nature was often an inspiration to us. In his life and during his illness, he was a "soldier" choosing the rebound from any mishap over pity.

His lesson was profound. In difficult times,we hold dear to it. In our grief we have found comfort in his gift and in his memory.